The unknown sucks. Here's what helps.
3 techniques that are helping me expand my comfort zone.
I’m not a big fan of the “get out of your comfort zone” narrative.
In my case, it more often leads to me being in full-body-lockdown panic mode than successful navigation of whatever the challenge is.
I’ve been very insecure throughout my teenage & uni years and my dearest friends used to joke that my name was “Thank you-I’m sorry Andjela” because I would apologize for the littlest of things (and feel grateful for the smallest gestures of kindness too, which is a habit I still nurture).
It took a lot of ugly snot-style crying & self-work, and meeting my now husband who liked me as I was from the start & didn’t feel the wish to change me (that was a first!) for me to actually start seeing that confidence level become more stable.
It still fluctuates depending on what’s going on in life, but it’s at a place where on most days it doesn’t prevent me from enjoying things in life and applying for the opportunities I want.
It took years to build that basic level of comfort zone when it comes to self-confidence and I have zero intentions of leaving it.
“Get out of your comfort zone” seems like terrible advice for those who took years to get to the place where they feel comfortable, whether around the subject of finances, work, appearance, interpersonal relationships, or anything else.
The thing is, learning the ropes of a new industry *is* uncomfortable. But it doesn’t have to be completely out there, diving-out-of-a-burning-plane-without-a-parachute-type of uncomfortable.
Rather than about leaving your comfort zone, a career change can be about expanding it, little by little, with small incremental steps of facing previously unfamiliar tasks.
Think: stepping knee-level into the sea & splashing your face and kidney area with water first instead of diving into the sea all hot and sweaty.
What helps?
So, the little steps - it’s all about them.
But they can be uncomfortable to take as well.
Luckily, there are techniques and tools that help with that live, as you’re going through the challenging experience.
What follows is a list of three things that have been helping me over the years.
Keep in mind that, depending on your current mental state, they might work for you or not be a match at all. Please practice discernment and take care of that glorious mind of yours. We’re all different. :)
So, here are my three things:
EFT tapping - “EFT” stands for “emotional freedom technique” and, as woo-woo as it sounds, it is what got me through the anxiety around making pitching-related work calls to people I don’t know (saying I wasn’t the biggest fan of phone calls is an understatement). I remember anxiously writing down lists of numbers I would need to call, practicing a mini opening script in my head, then tapping along with this video, and sitting down to make the calls 5 minutes later. And doing that again and again, day after day, until there was no more need for it. I still do EFT - whenever I recognize an internal obstacle within myself, I type “EFT for (my current emotional state/challenge) into YouTube. These days, it’s all about developing trust in the idea that I’m not behind in life or too slow at making progress with new skill development.
Journaling - Yes, it is on every person’s list ever when you google recommendations for improving your life, but that’s because it often works (I won’t generalize to “always” - there are always people who don’t enjoy the habit). I estimate that last summer, 70% of the clarity around what to pivot to once I close down my LLC. came from the book “The Artist’s Way” by Julia Cameron, which is actually a 12-week guided journaling program. And man, can a lot of changes fit in only 12 weeks! By September, my mind was in a completely different place. I plan on writing a separate article specifically about this book.
“And then what?” exercise - If, like me, you’re blessed with a mind that tends to gravitate towards the worst possible scenario (high five! 🙋🏼♀️), it might be a good idea to occasionally sit down and explore that scenario in depth. Grab a pen and some paper (or open a new Google Doc) and write about your fears, asking yourself “And then what?” after each new answer your brain comes up with.
Here’s an example:
“If this pivot thing doesn’t work, I’ll remain unemployed.” - And then what?
“Then I’ll have spent too long away from my previous industry so I’ll be undesirable there as well.” - And then what?
“Then we’ll be broke and I’ll need to find any available job ASAP.” - And then what?
…(continue for as long as you can go)
The good thing about this exercise is that it can give you ideas on what things you could do to prevent the worst-case scenario or who you could ask for assistance. It can also show you that you might be in a better place than you previously thought.
I love me some buffer zones
In my previous life as a sustainability communications consultant, I learned about the concept of buffer zones: land zones which are usually established to create a separation between conflicting or incompatible activities, land uses, or ecosystems.
The primary purpose of a buffer zone is to mitigate potential negative impacts, provide a safety margin, or maintain a balance between different elements. In the context of nature reserves or protected areas, a buffer zone may be established to shield the core conservation area from human activities or developments that could harm the ecosystem. This helps maintain biodiversity and ecological balance.
In the context of self-development, I see it as a part of myself that knows things take time, I already have a track record of making big life changes successfully and know how to wield the tools that can help me (in my case, EFT and journaling).
It’s the part of me that I can lean on when things get uncomfortable.
So until next week, here’s to your buffer zones.
May they help you bridge the unknown.
May they develop into your internal best buddies that help you stay on track toward making your dreams come true.
Your “It’s not oversharing if it's useful” gal,
Andjela
🌷
Welcome to the Career Pivot Diaries where I chronicle my journey from sustainability communications to QA testing! This is where we’ll cover all things career change, such as going from entrepreneurship to 9-to-5, exploring new professional identities, and *finally* updating that dusty CV. Most importantly, we’ll explore how to see ourselves as more than our work and find a sense of safety in choosing a new path while allowing room for creative play.
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